Barry Manilow explains why he waited decades to come out as gay

During a guest appearance on HBO’s Who’s Talking to Chris Wallace, the 80-year-old Copacabana singer said he didn’t think it was important to announce his sexuality during the earlier decades of his career.

Manilow came out in 2017, almost three years after he married his husband and manager Garry Kief in a private ceremony. The couple have been together for 45 years now, though they’ve kept much of their relationship away from the public eye.

When he came out to People magazine in 2017, Manilow — whose real name is Barry Pincus — worried he’d be “disappointing” some of his fans by revealing his sexuality. Instead, Manilow, who was 73 at the time, said the reaction from his fanbase was “beautiful.”

Garry Kief and Barry Manilow.
Garry Kief and Barry Manilow attend the 2016 Pre-Grammy Gala at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on Feb. 14, 2016, in Beverly Hills, Calif. Steve Granitz/WireImage

Despite his current feelings of nonchalance about his own coming out, Manilow said announcing his sexuality as his career was booming would have been a bad idea.

“Now being gay is no big deal,” he explained. “Back in the ’70s it would have killed a career.”

Regardless, the usually very private Manilow said he thinks “everybody knew that Garry and I were a couple all those years.”

“Really, Garry and I’ve been together for so long,” he said. “It just never dawned on me that we’re going to come out. But when we got married, it was a big deal, so we did.”

Manilow credited Kief for saving his life. He said he is thankful he had Kief to support him as his music career was taking off, despite keeping their relationship under wraps.

“As my career exploded, it was just crazy. And, you know, going back to an empty hotel room, you can get into a lot of trouble if you’re alone night after night after night,” Manilow explained. “But I met Garry right around when it was exploding. And I didn’t have to go back to those empty hotel rooms. I had somebody to cry with or to celebrate with.”

Manilow said he did not wish an isolated hotel room for any young people.

“It was pretty lonely until I met Garry. And then it was fun,” he smiled.

Kief is not Manilow’s first spouse. In 1964, Manilow married his high school sweetheart, Susan Deixler. They were married for one year.

Manilow told CNN’s Wallace he “really did love” Deixler, but added “the gay thing was pretty, pretty strong. I couldn’t deny it.”

The singer said he knew he was gay before marrying Deixler, but their marriage ended because Manilow couldn’t be the committed husband his then-wife needed. He revealed that his sexuality was not the reason his marriage failed.

“We had a very nice marriage, it was great, but I was away every night making music, as a young musician would be,” Manilow described. “It wasn’t good for me, and it wasn’t good for her.”

“I couldn’t be the proper husband,” he continued. “I was out making music every night, sowing my wild oats. I wasn’t ready to settle down.”

Brooklyn-born Manilow skyrocketed to international fame in 1974 after his release of the ever-popular pop-rock ballad Mandy. He became one of the biggest-selling musicians of all time. Prior to his success as a singer-songwriter, Manilow was behind a number of famous commercial jingles for brands like State Farm and Band-Aid — a gig that he has said helped him create catchy hooks for his own hit songs.

Barry Manilow.

If You Notice This While Brushing Your Teeth, It Could Be a Sign of Dementia

For the person suffering from dementia as well as the ones closest to them, it may be an extremely frightening disease. On the other hand, early detection of dementia symptoms might make everyone feel better prepared. More equipped to handle the ambiguity, emotional upheaval, or perplexity. Fortunately, Dr. Richard Restak’s book, How to Prevent Dementia, was released on October 17, 2023. Some early indicators of the condition are covered in the book. The physician reveals in the book that there are four main dementia early warning indicators. He refers to the symptoms of dementia as the “Four A’s” and describes how they might manifest in routine activities like brushing your teeth. He stated that the exterior manifestations and internal feelings of an Alzheimer’s patient are driven by four deficits.

1. Amnesia may be a sign of dementia

Memory loss due to dementia. Senior man losing parts of head as symbol of decreased mind function.

According to Dr. Restak, forgetfulness is a common aging process. Thus, it only warrants concern when it occurs frequently and involving items that ought to be commonplace. For instance, if you routinely lose track of details like your address, name, or family members’ names. He adds that while this is a typical aging symptom, it might not always indicate dementia.

2. Or aphasia

high angle view of senior man collecting jigsaw puzzle as dementia rehab

The term “aphasia” describes a problem of comprehension and communication. That is, a person’s capacity for speaking, writing, and reading could deteriorate. On a daily basis, this could appear to be someone who mispronounces a word or has forgotten what it means. Dr. Restak points out that this could not be a reliable indicator of dementia either. Why then include them? The solution is easy to understand. Diseases and people have a significant characteristic. Like diseases, we vary from case to case. No condition fits neatly into a box or checklist, and some symptoms may apply to some people but not to others. Rather, diseases and humans have certain characteristics that may fall into one category but not another. Consequently, even though these dementia symptoms might not apply to everyone, they can significantly help some people learn how to deal with and manage the condition.

3. Appropriate Indices of Dementia: Agnosia and Apraxia

Alzheimer's disease concept, Elderly woman holding brain symbol of missing jigsaw puzzle, World Alzheimer's, World mental health, Memory loss, Dementia, Parkinson disease.

One illness that affects the senses is anemia. It makes it impossible to identify well-known individuals or locations. This can be experienced by touch, taste, smell, sound, or sight. Among the instances are failing to identify a family member, house, or preferred destination for a Saturday excursion. Aphasia, on the other hand, is the final of the four symptoms of dementia and manifests itself when performing routine actions like brushing your teeth. Muscle function and strength are affected by the illness. Although apraxia can cause a person to forget to brush or even have difficulty holding the toothbrush, Dr. Restak cautions that the condition goes far deeper than that. When someone has apraxia, they frequently are unable to “tie all the actions together” or perform them in the right sequence. “An individual suffering from apraxia might be able to identify and even name a toothbrush and toothpaste, but they might not be able to perform the simple act of pressing toothpaste onto the toothbrush.” He composed. “All the muscle parts are there, but they are not able to work together.” Individuals in advanced phases could also find it difficult to take a shower or get dressed.Restak wrote in How to Prevent Dementia that “many, if not all, expressions of Alzheimer’s can be explained by reference to the four A’s.”

4. Alzheimer’s versus dementia

Healthy brain vs. Alzheimer's brain

The title of the book is Dementia Prevention. Still, Dr. Restak makes several allusions to Alzheimer’s. This is due to the long-held belief that the two illnesses are very similar. While this is accurate, there are a few significant distinctions between the two, and it turns out that one frequently leads to the other. In general medicine, the term “dementia” refers to brain changes brought on by aging, illness, or trauma. the term used to describe a collection of symptoms that impair a person’s capacity to operate and carry out daily tasks. Conversely, Alzheimer’s is more common in the old and senior population and frequently results in dementia.

5. Having a Conversation with an Expert

Senior with dementia or Alzheimer's is comforted by caring female doctor

It’s advised to get in touch with a medical expert right away if you believe someone you know is showing dementia symptoms. They will have a better understanding of your symptoms and be able to conduct tests that will help determine the exact cause. But the discussion may also be frightening, awkward, and emotionally charged. There are a few things one can do to facilitate a more seamless communication. First, make sure everything is quiet, peaceful, and devoid of distractions like the TV. After that, get ready for an emotional roller coaster. Just provide the facts, but do so in a kind and perceptive manner. Summarize the important points in brief phrases and words. Permit the other individual to finish speaking. It might also be advisable in some circumstances to enlist expert assistance. For example, you can probably get emotional support, resources, and sometimes even medical guidance about what’s ahead from a religious leader, a primary care physician, or a certified therapist. In any case, the first step to learning to live with and conquer the obstacles brought on by dementia is being aware of its symptoms.

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