According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.
We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.
A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.
According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.
Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.
Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.
Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.
According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.
Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.
Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”
How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.
Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.
Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.
During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.
Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.
People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.
- “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
- “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
- “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
- “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420
What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?
7 Job Interview Secret Tricks Every Applicant Should Know
Job interviews are an essential step in the hiring process for employers to evaluate your professional profile. As an applicant, you may think that answering simple questions is enough to impress the hiring manager. However, it’s crucial to understand that job interviews can also include hidden tests that measure your honesty and reliability. We want to help you prepare for your job interviews like a pro. Our team is one step ahead and has uncovered the secrets behind common interview tricks. Keep reading to learn more and ace your next job interview.
1. Discover the “Coffee Cup” test for job interviews
In recent times, the “coffee cup” test has gained popularity among recruiters. During the interview, the hiring manager takes the interviewee to the kitchen to offer them a drink. At the end of the meeting, the employer observes the candidate’s response to the coffee cup: whether they inquire where to put it, leave it on the table, or wash it themselves in the kitchen.
Trent Innes, the former Managing Director of Xero Australia and Asia, who devised this method, asserts that: “This trick reveals more about a person’s character and manners than their answers to questions. It can also show how quickly the candidate will fit into a team. In this case, the right decision is to stop by the kitchen after the interview and scrub the mug yourself.”
2. The importance of punctuality and emotional stability in job interviews
Compared to this new job interview technique, the coffee cup test seems benign. When a candidate is scheduled for a 9 a.m. interview and arrives promptly after waking up early, only to be made to wait due to the employer’s “busy” schedule. The interviewee must endure waiting for 10 minutes, and then another 10… and eventually 15 minutes more.
This technique serves to reveal the applicant’s emotional stability when handling stressful situations and their eagerness to secure the position by demonstrating their level of patience. Punctuality and composure under pressure are valuable attributes that recruiters look for in their candidates.
3. Remaining composed under pressure during job interviews
Raising one’s voice, shouting, or even swearing is yet another tactic to simulate a stressful situation and test the limits of the candidate’s nerves. Experts recommend staying composed and responding to questions as calmly as possible.
It is essential to demonstrate emotional stability and composure during challenging situations, as this showcases one’s ability to handle stress effectively. These are crucial traits that recruiters look for when assessing candidates during job interviews.
4. Creative thinking in job interviews: how to handle unusual requests
Candidates may encounter yet another surprise during job interviews, presented in the form of an eccentric request, such as jumping out of a window. This request aims to evaluate the candidate’s ability to think creatively and outside the box.
To navigate such a situation, one can climb up to the window and jump onto the office floor where the interview is taking place, as there were no instructions on where to land. Alternatively, the candidate can respond with a win-win counter-question, such as “What benefit would my jump bring to the company?”
Handling unconventional requests is an opportunity to showcase one’s creative problem-solving skills, and this quality is highly valued by recruiters in many industries.
5. Assessing candidate adaptability in job interviews: how to handle unusual interviewer behavior
Employers may utilize another interview technique by displaying unusual behavior, such as ignoring the candidate and staring intently at the computer screen or suddenly leaving during the interview to take a phone call, leaving the applicant alone in the office.
This tactic serves to evaluate the candidate’s adaptability and assess how they handle unforeseen situations. One effective solution is to collaborate with the secretary to reschedule the interview for another day.
Adaptability is a valuable attribute that recruiters seek in candidates, as it indicates the ability to adjust to new situations, think on their feet, and navigate challenging circumstances effectively. Demonstrating flexibility and resourcefulness during job interviews can enhance one’s chances of securing the position.
6. Post-interview evaluation: meeting potential co-workers
It is common for employers to invite applicants to meet with potential co-workers in a non-work environment or specific situation after the interview concludes. This is more than just a friendly gesture; it provides an opportunity for the employer to evaluate the candidate based on feedback from existing employees.
Meeting with potential co-workers is an essential step in the hiring process as it allows recruiters to gain insight into how the candidate will fit into the company culture and interact with the team. A positive evaluation from co-workers can significantly enhance the candidate’s chances of receiving a job offer.
7. Cooperation test: responding to a simple request
Another assessment commonly used by employers is the cooperation test, which evaluates whether candidates possess helpful and cooperative qualities. During the interview, the employer may intentionally drop their pen to observe the candidate’s reaction. If the applicant instinctively bends down to pick up the pen, it indicates a willingness to cooperate, increasing the chances of receiving a job offer. Conversely, if the candidate allows the employer to pick up the pen on their own, it may negatively impact their chances of securing the position.
Cooperative individuals are highly valued in the workplace as they possess qualities such as teamwork, communication, and a positive attitude. Demonstrating these qualities during the hiring process can help candidates stand out to potential employers.
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