According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.
We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.
A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.
According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.
Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.
Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.
Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.
According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.
Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.
Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”
How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.
Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.
Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.
During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.
Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.
People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.
- “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
- “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
- “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
- “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420
What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?
Emotional Moment: Reports reveal that Prince Harry was brought to tears after learning that his brother, Prince William, received a new title from King Charles, adding tension between the royal siblings.
Prince Harry is reportedly devastated after learning that his brother, Prince William, has been awarded a new military title once held by Harry himself. King Charles appointed William as the Colonel-in-Chief of the Army Air Corps, a role Harry cherished during his time as a working royal. According to royal expert Richard Fitzwilliams, this news has left Harry “in tears” and feeling further isolated from his family.
The military title was something deeply personal to Harry, as it connected to one of the few periods in his life when he felt recognized for his own achievements, independent of his royal status.
Harry had always taken great pride in his military service. He served ten years in the British Army, completing two tours of duty in Afghanistan, and his role as Colonel-in-Chief of the Army Air Corps was a point of honor. Losing that title has been particularly painful for him, as it symbolizes a deeper separation from his previous life and the duties he genuinely loved. Richard Fitzwilliams noted that for Harry, this decision by his father is a “real kick in the teeth,” especially given his strained relationship with both King Charles and Prince William in recent years.
The timing of the announcement has only worsened the situation for Harry. Buckingham Palace made the news public while Harry was in the U.K. for the 10th anniversary of the Invictus Games, an event he founded to honor wounded veterans. During this time, Harry appeared at St. Paul’s Cathedral, wearing his KCVO (Royal Victorian Order) medal, a reminder of his contributions to the monarchy.
Royal author Tom Quinn suggested that Harry’s choice to wear the medal at this event was a symbolic gesture, saying, “This was Harry’s way of reminding his family that his grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II, valued his contributions to the royal family.”
Despite the emotional blow, Harry remains committed to his ties with the military. However, being stripped of this honorary role in favor of his brother has reportedly intensified his feelings of betrayal. Fitzwilliams commented that Harry believes this decision further marginalizes him, reinforcing the distance between him and his family. He is said to be especially hurt that the title was given to his brother, someone he sees as part of the reason behind many of his struggles with the royal family.
Harry’s reaction to William’s new title reflects deeper issues within the royal family. The strained relationship between the brothers has been widely reported, and this latest development is seen as a significant blow to any hopes of reconciliation. The fact that Harry was once proud of his role in the military but is now watching his former position being given to his brother is seen by many as a public demonstration of how far he has been distanced from his royal duties.
As the royal family prepares for the official title handover at the Army Aviation Centre in Middle Wallop in May 2024, it marks a further step in what some see as Harry’s increasing estrangement from his previous life. The appointment of Prince William as Colonel-in-Chief of the Army Air Corps seems to cement Prince Harry’s permanent departure from both his military and royal responsibilities, a reality that, according to sources, has left him deeply saddened and emotional.
Richard Fitzwilliams, a royal expert, emphasized that the conflict between Prince Harry and King Charles III is one of the most publicized family rifts in the world. He suggested that if the situation had been handled privately, away from media speculation, there might have been a greater chance for reconciliation. Unfortunately, the tensions between the Duke of Sussex and his father run deep, as evidenced by the fact that, even when Harry returned to the U.K. in May 2024, they did not meet, which shocked and disappointed the public.
A spokesperson for Prince Harry released a statement confirming that, despite numerous inquiries and rumors, the Duke would not be meeting with the King during his visit due to the King’s busy schedule. The statement explained that Harry understood his father’s commitments and hoped to see him soon. King Charles, recently back to his public duties after a period of treatment for cancer, was occupied with official events, including a meeting with the Prime Minister of Fiji and the season’s first garden party at Buckingham Palace.
This news led to a wave of public backlash, with many criticizing the King for not prioritizing his son. Some social media users condemned the situation, calling it “unforgivable” and expressing disappointment in Charles, while others defended Harry, noting that he had made numerous attempts to reconnect. One commenter remarked that it was clear King Charles chose his position and duties over his family.
Prince Harry’s schedule during his visit was also packed, as he focused on the 10th anniversary of the Invictus Games. He participated in various events, including giving a reading at St. Paul’s Cathedral. Despite being in the same country, the physical and emotional distance between Harry and his father—and his brother, Prince William—remains significant.
In an earlier interview with “Good Morning America,” Prince Harry spoke openly about the strained relationship with his brother. When asked how their late mother, Princess Diana, would feel about their falling out, Harry said she would likely be saddened but would also recognize that healing the relationship would require going through these difficult phases. He added that he feels his mother’s presence more strongly now than ever before, especially during these times of family turmoil.
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