The morning sun, usually a welcome sight, cast harsh shadows on the woman standing on my porch, her face a mask of indignation. Mrs. Gable, Grandma’s “entitled neighbor,” as she so lovingly referred to her, was a force of nature, and not a particularly pleasant one.
“How long am I supposed to wait for my share of the will?!” she demanded, her voice a grating rasp that could curdle milk. “My grandkids are coming over, and I want them to take their part of the inheritance before they leave!”
I blinked, trying to process the sheer audacity of her statement. “Mrs. Gable,” I said, my voice calm despite the rising tide of annoyance, “Grandma’s will… it doesn’t mention you.”
Her eyes widened, then narrowed into slits. “Nonsense! We were like family! She wouldn’t leave me out.”
“I’m sorry,” I said, “but everything in the house now belongs to me.”
I offered a small concession. “I’ve packed some boxes for donation. You’re welcome to look through them, see if there’s anything you want.”
“Donation boxes?!” she shrieked. “Your grandma was like family to us! We had to be mentioned in the will. Give it to me! I have to see for myself.”
“I can’t do that,” I said, my patience wearing thin. “The will is a legal document.”
She planted her feet, a stubborn look on her face. “Then I’m not leaving. I’ll just stand here until you give me what’s mine.” She proceeded to stand directly in front of my porch, peering into my windows and muttering under her breath.
I sighed. This was getting ridiculous. I needed to give this woman a reality check, a gentle but firm reminder that she wasn’t entitled to anything.
I went inside, grabbed a pen and a scrap of paper, and returned to the porch. Mrs. Gable watched me, her eyes filled with suspicion.
“What’s that?” she asked, her voice laced with distrust.
“I’m writing you a bill,” I said, my voice deliberately casual.
“A bill? For what?”
“For services rendered,” I said, scribbling on the paper. “Let’s see… ‘Consultation regarding inheritance, one hour… $100.'”
Mrs. Gable’s face turned a shade of purple I didn’t think possible. “Are you serious?!”
“Perfectly,” I said, adding another line. “‘Unauthorized surveillance of private property, one hour… $50.'”
“That’s outrageous!” she sputtered.
“And,” I continued, adding a final line, “‘Emotional distress caused by unwarranted demands, one hour… $150.'” I handed her the paper. “That’ll be $300, Mrs. Gable.”
She snatched the paper from my hand, her eyes scanning the ludicrous list. “You can’t do this!”
“Actually, I can,” I said, a smile playing on my lips. “And if you don’t pay, I’ll have to add late fees.”
She crumpled the paper in her fist, her face a mask of fury. “You’re just like your grandma!” she hissed. “Entitled and selfish!”
“Perhaps,” I said, “but I’m also practical. And I value my peace of mind.”
She glared at me for a moment, then turned and stomped off the porch, muttering about lawyers and lawsuits. I watched her go, a sense of satisfaction washing over me.
Later that day, as I sorted through Grandma’s belongings, I found a small, velvet-lined box tucked away in a drawer. Inside was a handwritten note, addressed to me.
“My dearest grandchild,” it read, “I know Mrs. Gable can be… persistent. Remember, you owe no one anything. Your happiness is your own. And sometimes, a little bit of absurdity is the best way to deal with entitlement.”
I smiled, a warm feeling spreading through my chest. Grandma had known exactly what to do. And she had left me the perfect tool to handle it. I had learned a valuable lesson that day: sometimes, the best way to deal with entitled people is to meet their absurdity with your own. And a little bit of humor never hurts.
Quick and Easy Homemade Fresh Cheese
Hi there, cheese enthusiasts! Do you feel like having something really tasty that is also creamy and fresh? What if I told you that it would just take you fifteen minutes to create your own cheese at home? It is true, indeed! A few basic ingredients and a little culinary wizardry will allow you to create an impressive batch of fresh cheese that you make yourself.
Why Make Cheese at Home?
Although it can seem difficult to make cheese at home, it’s actually very simple. It’s also a lovely method to ensure that your food is fresh and natural by knowing exactly what’s going into it. The components are basic, the method is short, and the end product is mouthwatering.
What You’ll require:
Let’s Prepare Some Cheese!
First, fill the big pot with milk and bring it to a simmer over medium heat. Keep an eye on it and stir it from time to time to make sure nothing gets stuck to the bottom. The magic will begin to happen as bubbles start to develop around the edges!
After removing the heat, squeeze in some lemon juice or white vinegar. As you observe the milk start to curdle, gently stir it. This is the magical time when milk becomes cheese, my friends. At this point, we’re practically wizards of food.
Give the mixture ten minutes or so to settle. The whey, or liquid, and the curds, or lumpy particles, will separate during this period. Interesting fact: Little Miss Muffet had a good idea.
It’s time to strain the mixture after it has sat and separated. Pour the mixture through a fine strainer or cheesecloth that has been lined over a bowl. If you don’t want cheese all over your kitchen, please take your time with this step.
Pull the cheesecloth together and gently squeeze it to get some of the whey. Squeeze a little more if you prefer your cheese firmer. To taste, add a pinch or two of salt and stir. And voilà! You have fresh, handmade cheese at your disposal.
What makes this cheese so good? It is quite adaptable. You may eat it right out of the bowl, sprinkle it in a salad, or spread it over some crusty toast. I’m not passing judgment here.
Finally
Folks, there you have it! Not only is it simple to make fresh cheese at home, but it’s also enjoyable and very fulfilling. In about fifteen minutes, you may also boast to your friends that you have turned into a cheese artisan. Now, how affluent do you feel?
Thus, the next time you’re in the mood for something delicious and fresh, make your own instead of buying anything from the shop. Your family and your taste buds will appreciate it.
Cheeze on!
Dwight’s Opinion: To be honest, creating cheese at home is like to discovering a hidden level in a video game. It’s easy, enjoyable, and yields some seriously tasty results. Who doesn’t enjoy a little culinary magic, too?
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