I was stunned when my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule to help me “become a better wife.” But instead of blowing up, I played along. Little did Jake know, I was about to teach him a lesson that would make him rethink his newfound approach to marriage.
I’ve always prided myself on being the level-headed one in our marriage. Jake, bless his heart, could get swept up in things pretty easily, whether it was a new hobby, or some random YouTube video that promised to change his life in three easy steps.
But we were solid until Jake met Steve. Steve was the type of guy who thought being loudly opinionated made him right, the type that talks right over you when you try to correct him.
He was also a perpetually single guy (who could have guessed?), who graciously dispensed relationship advice to all his married colleagues, Jake included. Jake should’ve known better, but my darling husband was positively smitten with Steve’s confidence.
I didn’t think much of it until Jake started making some noxious comments.
“Steve says relationships work best when the wife takes charge of the household,” he’d say. Or “Steve thinks it’s important for women to look good for their husbands, no matter how long they’ve been married.”
I’d roll my eyes and reply with some sarcastic remark, but it was getting under my skin. Jake was changing. He’d arch his eyebrows if I ordered takeout instead of cooking, and sigh when I let the laundry pile up because, God forbid, I had my own full-time job.
And then it happened. One night, he came home with The List.
He sat me down at the kitchen table, unfolded a piece of paper, and slid it across to me.
“I’ve been thinking,” he started, his voice dripping with a condescending tone I hadn’t heard from him before. “You’re a great wife, Lisa. But there’s room for improvement.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Oh really?”
He nodded, oblivious to the danger zone he was entering. “Yeah. Steve helped me realize that our marriage could be even better if you, you know, stepped up a bit.”
I stared at the paper in front of me. It was a schedule… and he’d written “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife” at the top in bold.
This guy had actually sat down and mapped out my entire week based on what Steve — a single guy with zero relationship experience — thought I should do to “improve” myself as a wife.
I was supposed to wake up at 5 a.m. every day to make Jake a gourmet breakfast. Then I’d hit the gym for an hour to “stay in shape.”
After that? A delightful lineup of chores: cleaning, laundry, ironing. And that was all before I left for work. I was supposed to cook a meal from scratch every evening and make fancy snacks for Jake and his friends when they came over to hang out at our place.
The whole thing was sexist and insulting on so many levels I didn’t even know where to start. I ended up staring at him, wondering if my husband had lost his mind.
“This will be great for you, and us,” he continued, oblivious.
“Steve says it’s important to maintain structure, and I think you could benefit from —”
“I could benefit from what?” I interrupted, my voice dangerously calm. Jake blinked, caught off guard by the interruption, but he recovered quickly.
“Well, you know, from having some guidance and a schedule.”
I wanted to throw that paper in his face and ask him if he’d developed a death wish. Instead, I did something that surprised even me: I smiled.
“You’re right, Jake,” I said sweetly. “I’m so lucky that you made me this schedule. I’ll start tomorrow.”
The relief on his face was instant. I almost felt sorry for him as I got up and stuck the list on the fridge. Almost. He had no idea what was coming.
The next day, I couldn’t help but smirk as I studied the ridiculous schedule again. If Jake thought he could hand me a list of “improvements,” then he was about to find out just how much structure our life could really handle.
I pulled out my laptop, opened up a fresh document, and titled it, “Jake’s Plan for Becoming the Best Husband Ever.” He wanted a perfect wife? Fine. But there was a cost to perfection.
Advertisement
I began by listing all the things he had suggested for me, starting with the gym membership he was so keen on. It was laughable, really.
“$1,200 for a personal trainer.” I typed, barely containing my giggle.
Next came the food. If Jake wanted to eat like a king, that wasn’t happening on our current grocery budget. Organic, non-GMO, free-range everything? That stuff didn’t come cheap.
“$700 per month for groceries,” I wrote. He’d probably need to chip in for a cooking class too. Those were pricey, but hey, perfection wasn’t free.
I leaned back in my chair, laughing to myself as I imagined Jake’s face when he saw this. But I wasn’t done. Oh no, the pièce de résistance was still to come.
See, there was no way I could juggle all these expectations while holding down my job. If Jake wanted me to dedicate myself full-time to his absurd routine, then he’d have to compensate for the loss of my income.
I pulled up a calculator, estimating the value of my salary. Then, I added it to the list, complete with a little note: “$75,000 per year to replace Lisa’s salary since she will now be your full-time personal assistant, maid, and chef.”
My stomach hurt from laughing at this point.
And just for good measure, I threw in a suggestion about him needing to expand the house. After all, if he was going to have his friends over regularly, they’d need a dedicated space that wouldn’t intrude on my newly organized, impossibly structured life.
“$50,000 to build a separate ‘man cave’ so Jake and his friends don’t disrupt Lisa’s schedule.”
By the time I was done, the list was a masterpiece. A financial and logistical nightmare, sure, but a masterpiece nonetheless. It wasn’t just a counterattack — it was a wake-up call.
I printed it out, set it neatly on the kitchen counter, and waited for Jake to come home. When he finally walked through the door that evening, he was in a good mood.
“Hey, babe,” he called out, dropping his keys on the counter. He spotted the paper almost immediately. “What’s this?”
I kept my face neutral, fighting the urge to laugh as I watched him pick it up. “Oh, it’s just a little list I put together for you,” I said sweetly, “to help you become the best husband ever.”
Jake chuckled, thinking I was playing along with his little game. But as he scanned the first few lines, the grin started to fade. I could see the wheels turning in his head, the slow realization that this wasn’t the lighthearted joke he thought it was.
“Wait… what is all this?” He squinted at the numbers, his eyes widening as he saw the total costs. “$1,200 for a personal trainer? $700 a month for groceries? What the hell, Lisa?”
I leaned against the kitchen island, crossing my arms.
“Well, you want me to wake up at 5 a.m., hit the gym, make gourmet breakfasts, clean the house, cook dinner, and host your friends. I figured we should budget for all of that, don’t you think?”
His face turned pale as he flipped through the pages. “$75,000 a year? You’re quitting your job?!”
I shrugged. “How else am I supposed to follow your plan? I can’t work and be the perfect wife, right?”
He stared at the paper, dumbfounded.
The numbers, the absurdity of his own demands, it all hit him at once. His smugness evaporated, replaced by a dawning realization that he had seriously, seriously messed up.
“I… I didn’t mean…” Jake stammered, looking at me with wide eyes. “Lisa, I didn’t mean for it to be like this. I just thought —”
“You thought what? That I could ‘improve’ myself like some project?” My voice was calm, but the hurt behind it was real. “Jake, marriage isn’t about lists or routines. It’s about respect. And if you ever try to ‘fix’ me like this again, you’ll be paying a hell of a lot more than what’s on that paper.”
Silence hung in the air, thick and uncomfortable. Jake’s face softened, his shoulders slumping as he let out a deep sigh.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t realize how ridiculous it was. Steve made it sound sensible, but now I see it’s… it’s toxic. Oh God, I’ve been such a fool.”
I nodded, watching him carefully. “Yes, you have. Honestly, have you looked at Steve’s life? What makes you think he has the life experience to give you advice about marriage? Or anything else?”
The look on his face as my words hit home was priceless.
“You’re right. And he could never afford to live like this.” He slapped the list with the back of his hand. “He… he has no idea about the costs involved, or how demeaning this is. Oh, Lisa, I got carried away again, didn’t I?”
“Yes, but we’ll recover. Now, let’s tear that paper up and go back to being equals.”
He smiled weakly, the tension breaking just a little. “Yeah… let’s do that.”
We ripped up the list together, and for the first time in weeks, I felt like we were back on the same team.
Maybe this was what we needed, a reminder that marriage isn’t about one person being “better” than the other. It’s about being better together.
I Woke up to My Husband Mumbling in His Sleep – When He Finished His ‘Speech,’ I Immediately Ran to Our Garage
When I woke to my husband mumbling in his sleep, I thought it was just another strange dream. But his words, “She’s in my garage right now. You can go down and find her there,” sent a chill through me, leading to a discovery that changed everything.
It started with a whisper. I was half-asleep when I heard murmured words tumbling from Robert’s lips.
A sleepless woman in her bed | Source: Midjourney
“Yes, officer,” he said, his voice barely above a mumble. “It’s completely my fault. She’s in my garage right now. You can go down and find her there.”
My eyes shot open.
At first, I thought I’d misheard him. But then, he rolled over, still muttering something unintelligible. My heart began to race. Who was in the garage? What was he talking about?
A serious sleepless woman in her bedroom | Source: Midjourney
Robert wasn’t the type to keep secrets. He was kind, dependable, and, well, predictable. We’d been married five years.
He used to work as a veterinarian, but last year, he opened a 24-hour café in the next town. It had been his dream, though it kept him out late most nights.
A man working in his cafe | Source: Pexels
Earlier that evening, he texted me to say he’d be home late and told me to go to bed without him. That was odd. He rarely worked past midnight. But I didn’t think much of it at the time. Now, as I lay in the dark, his words hung in the air.
I sat up in bed and glanced at him. He looked peaceful, his chest rising and falling with each breath. Maybe I should just wake him and ask what he meant. But the way his words sounded so serious, almost guilty, stopped me.
A man sleeping | Source: Pexels
I slipped out of bed, careful not to wake him, and tiptoed toward the door.
The hallway was quiet. Shadows stretched across the floor, and the only sound was the faint hum of the refrigerator downstairs. My mind raced with possibilities. Could someone really be in the garage?
A woman walking in her hallway | Source: Midjourney
I reached the top of the stairs and paused. My hand rested on the railing, and for a moment, I considered going back to bed. Maybe it was just a dream. But what if it wasn’t?
As I descended the stairs, the cold air from the garage seeped under the door, making me shiver. The closer I got, the more I felt a tightness in my chest.
A door in the hallway | Source: Midjourney
The door to the garage creaked as I opened it.
Inside, it was darker than I expected. The single bulb above the workbench barely lit the room, casting long shadows over the concrete floor.
Robert’s car sat in the middle of the space, its hood dented. My breath caught.
A dented car | Source: Midjourney
That wasn’t there yesterday.
The air smelled faintly of oil and something musky and wild.
Then I heard it.
A low, rasping sound, like heavy breathing, coming from the far corner of the garage. My body froze, and for a moment, I couldn’t move. The sound was rhythmic, almost like an animal panting.
A nervous woman in a garage | Source: Midjourney
“Hello?” I whispered, my voice trembling.
No response.
I forced myself to take a step forward. Then another. My feet felt like lead as I moved closer to the corner.
A nervous woman | Source: Midjourney
As my eyes adjusted to the dim light, I saw a small, shadowy figure curled up on a pile of blankets. It didn’t move at first, but as I got closer, I could make out its shape.
It was a fox.
Its reddish fur was matted, and its body seemed frail. It lifted its head slightly, its dark eyes meeting mine. The shallow and labored breathing I’d heard was coming from the fox.
A fox sleeping in a garage | Source: Midjourney
Relief washed over me. It wasn’t a person. But then, a new wave of worry set in. Why was there an injured fox in my garage?
I crouched down, careful not to get too close. The fox’s ears twitched, and it let out a soft whimper.
“You poor thing,” I murmured.
A fox looking up | Source: Midjourney
It looked so weak and could barely hold itself up.
I stood and backed away slowly, my mind spinning with questions. That’s when I decided to head to the kitchen. Maybe some water would help. Maybe…
I turned toward the door, leaving the fox in the corner, and quietly made my way back inside the house.
A woman in a garage | Source: Midjourney
I poured water into a shallow bowl and headed back toward the garage, my mind still reeling. As I rounded the corner into the kitchen, I nearly dropped the bowl.
Robert stood there, rubbing his eyes, his hair sticking up in every direction. “What are you doing up?” he asked, his voice groggy.
I froze for a second, unsure how to start. “Uh… there’s a fox. In the garage.”
A sleepy man in the kitchen | Source: Midjourney
His eyes widened, and for a moment, he looked like a kid caught sneaking cookies. “You saw her?”
“Her?” I raised an eyebrow. “Robert, what is going on?”
He sighed and leaned against the counter, running a hand through his hair. “Okay, okay. Don’t freak out. I was driving home, and this fox darted out onto the road. I didn’t see her in time. I hit her.”
A sad man in the kitchen | Source: Midjourney
“You hit her?” My voice rose. “With the car?”
“Yes,” he said quickly, holding up his hands. “It wasn’t too bad — just a bump. She was still alive, so I took her to the clinic where I used to work. They checked her out and said she’d be fine, but she needed to be watched for a few days.”
A man holding a fox | Source: Midjourney
“Robert…” I started, but he cut me off.
“I know, I know. You hate the idea of animals in the house. But she wouldn’t stop crying when I tried to leave her there. I couldn’t just leave her. You know how much I love animals.”
I softened a little at his tone. He sounded so earnest, so guilty.
A smiling woman talking to her husband | Source: Midjourney
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, setting the bowl of water on the counter.
“I didn’t want to wake you. And then I figured it might be better to, uh, explain later.”
I crossed my arms. “So you brought her home and decided to stash her in the garage?”
He grinned sheepishly. “I panicked.”
A man with a small smile talking to his wife | Source: Midjourney
Despite myself, I laughed. “You panicked?”
“Yeah. And I guess that explains the weird dream about the cop,” he said, scratching the back of his neck. “I must’ve been stressed about the car damage. In my dream, they were accusing me of hitting a person!”
The police questioning a man | Source: Midjourney
I couldn’t help but laugh again, shaking my head. “You’re impossible, Robert.”
He stepped closer, his expression softening. “I’m sorry. Really. I just couldn’t leave her. I thought I’d take care of her for a few days and then release her. If you want, I can take her somewhere else tomorrow.”
A happy couple talking | Source: Midjourney
I looked at him, at the way his shoulders sagged under the weight of his guilt. “Let’s just make sure she’s okay for now. But you owe me big time.”
His face lit up. “Deal.”
A smiling man talking to his wife | Source: Midjourney
The next few days were a whirlwind of learning how to care for a wild animal. We took turns feeding the fox small amounts of food and making sure she had plenty of water. Robert even dug out an old space heater to keep the garage warm for her.
At first, I kept my distance, letting Robert handle most of the care. But one evening, as I was checking on her, the fox lifted her head and let out a soft, almost thankful sound. It melted something in me.
A woman sitting next to a fox | Source: Midjourney
“She likes you,” Robert said, leaning in the doorway.
“Maybe,” I said, smiling.
By the end of the week, the fox was stronger. She could stand and even walk a few steps. Robert and I would sit in the garage, watching as she cautiously explored her little corner.
A fox walking | Source: Midjourney
“You’re really good with her,” I told him one night.
He shrugged. “It’s nothing. I just… I’ve always felt a connection to animals, you know? They don’t expect much — just kindness.”
I nodded, realizing for the first time how much his love for animals said about his character.
A woman talking to her husband | Source: Midjourney
Two weeks later, it was time to let her go.
We drove to a nearby forest where Robert had hit her, the fox nestled in a crate in the backseat. She seemed calm. It was as if she knew what was happening.
When we opened the crate, she hesitated for a moment before stepping out. She sniffed the air, then turned to look at us.
A fox coming out of the crate | Source: Midjourney
“Go on,” Robert said softly.
The fox took a few steps, then stopped. She turned back and, to my surprise, nuzzled her head against Robert’s leg before darting into the trees.
I blinked back tears. “She’s going to be okay, isn’t she?”
Robert nodded. “Yeah. She’ll be okay.”
A happy couple in the woods | Source: Midjourney
From that day on, we made it a habit to visit the forest. Each time, the fox would appear, bounding through the underbrush to greet us. She’d rub against our legs, her way of saying thank you.
Looking back, I never would’ve imagined that a sleepless night and a strange mumbling dream would lead to a bond with a wild fox and a deeper connection to the man I married.
A fox nuzzling against a man’s feet | Source: Midjourney
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
Leave a Reply