My Friend Excluded Me from His Wedding, and His Reason Left Me Speechless

The open bar was a hit. Everyone was mingling, drinks in hand, and laughter filled the room. The waiters placed two bottles of wine on each table, along with bread and butter.

“This wine is fantastic,” Bob said, pouring himself another glass. “Have you tried it, Mike?”

“Not yet, but I will,” I replied, reaching for my glass.

Soon, the buffet was announced. The emcee explained that tables would be called up a few at a time, starting with family.

“That makes sense,” Sarah said. “Family first.”

We watched as the first few tables were called. The buffet looked incredible, with a variety of dishes. However, I noticed something concerning.

“Those plates are piled high,” I whispered to Sarah. “I hope there’s enough for everyone.”

“Yeah, me too,” she replied, frowning.

Time passed, and more tables were called. Family members returned for seconds, their plates even fuller than before. My stomach grumbled as we waited.

“Finally!” I said when our table was called.

But when we reached the buffet, it was almost empty. We managed to scrape together a few scraps and returned to our seats, feeling disappointed.

“This is all that’s left?” Jane asked, looking at her nearly empty plate.

“Afraid so,” I said. “I can’t believe they ran out of food.”

Everyone at our table was visibly upset. The mood had shifted from joy to frustration.

“This is ridiculous!” Bob said. “I’m still hungry.”

“Me too,” Sarah added. “What are we supposed to do now?”

We sat there, picking at our meager portions. The conversations around us became hushed and tense.

“Someone should have planned better,” Jane muttered. “This is a wedding, for goodness’ sake.”

Tom, the groom, walked over with a concerned look on his face.

“Hey, Mike, is everything okay?” he asked.

“Not really, Tom,” I replied. “There’s no food left. We’re all still hungry.”

Tom’s face fell. “I’m so sorry. I thought there would be enough for everyone.”

“It’s not your fault,” Sarah said kindly. “We’ll figure something out.”

After Tom left, we continued to chat, trying to make the best of the situation.

“Wouldn’t it be funny if we just ordered pizza?” Bob joked, trying to lighten the mood.

“That’s not a bad idea,” I said, half-serious. “I’m starving.”

“Let’s do it,” Jane said, her eyes lighting up. “We can all pitch in.”

Everyone agreed, and we quickly pooled our money. I called a nearby pizza place and ordered four large pizzas and some wings.

“Thirty minutes,” the delivery guy said. “We’ll be right there.”

“Perfect,” I replied, feeling a bit of relief.

We waited, our anticipation growing. The mood at our table started to improve as we imagined the pizza arriving.

“I can’t believe we’re doing this!” Sarah laughed. “This is going to be a story to tell!”

Finally, the pizzas arrived. I met the delivery guy outside and carried the boxes in, feeling the eyes of other guests on me.

“Did you really order pizza?” one of them asked, surprised.

“Yep,” I said, grinning. “Help yourselves if you didn’t get enough food.”

As we started eating, the atmosphere at our table transformed. We shared the pizzas with nearby tables that had also missed out on the buffet, and everyone was grateful.

“This is the best idea ever!” Bob said, biting into a slice. “Thanks, Mike!”

“No problem,” I replied, feeling a sense of camaraderie. However, I didn’t notice the other tables looking at us with clear disapproval.

I tried to enjoy my pizza, but I couldn’t shake the feeling something bad was coming. Just then, a tall man in a suit, who I recognized as Linda’s father, approached our table.

“Excuse me,” he said, his voice stern. “Where did you get that pizza?”

I looked up at him and sighed. “We ordered it. There wasn’t enough food left at the buffet, and we were all still hungry.”

He glanced at the nearly empty pizza boxes, his eyes narrowing. “You didn’t get enough food?”

“No,” I replied, trying to stay calm. “By the time we got to the buffet, there was hardly anything left.”

Linda’s father frowned. “There are two slices left. May I have one?”

I looked at him, feeling a mix of frustration and disbelief. “Honestly, sir, no. Your family ate most of the buffet food. We had to order this just to get something in our stomachs.”

His face turned red. “You’re refusing to share?”

“Yes,” I said firmly. “We barely got to eat anything, and we’re still hungry.”

He stood there for a moment, clearly angry. Then he turned and walked back to his table, muttering under his breath. The tension in the room was palpable. I could see the bride, Linda, glaring at us from across the room. The family at their table was whispering and shooting daggers our way.

“This isn’t good,” Jane said quietly. “I think we’re in trouble.”

Tom came back over, looking distressed. “Mike, I’m sorry, but you and Sarah need to leave.”

“What? Why?” I asked, feeling a surge of anger.

“Linda is really upset,” Tom explained. “Her father is furious. They think you disrespected them by ordering pizza and not sharing.”

I shook my head in disbelief. “Tom, we were starving. We didn’t mean any disrespect.”

“I know,” he said, looking genuinely sorry. “But it’s causing too much tension. Please, just go. We’ll talk later.”

Feeling frustrated and hurt, I nodded. “Alright, we’ll leave.”

Sarah and I gathered our things and left the reception. We called a cab and went home, the evening ending on a sour note.

A few days later, Tom called me. “Mike, can we talk?”

“Sure,” I said, still feeling a bit annoyed. “What’s up?”

“I want to apologize,” Tom began. “I had a long talk with Linda and her family. They realize now that there wasn’t enough food for everyone. Linda is furious with her family for taking so much and leaving the other guests with nothing.”

“I appreciate that, Tom,” I said, feeling a bit relieved. “It was a tough situation for everyone.”

“Yeah, it was,” Tom agreed. “Linda’s father feels terrible about what happened. He wants to make it up to everyone.”

“Really? How?” I asked, curious.

“He’s planning an ‘After Wedding Shindig’,” Tom explained. “He’s going to invite everyone who was at the wedding, plus a few more. There will be plenty of food and entertainment. He wants to make sure no one goes hungry this time.”

“That sounds great,” I said, genuinely pleased. “When is it?”

“Mid-August,” Tom replied. “He’s pulling in favors and going all out. There’ll be food, drinks, music, and even some fun activities like axe throwing and a bonfire.”

“Wow, that sounds amazing,” I said, smiling. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“Me too,” Tom said. “I hope this helps smooth things over.”

“I think it will,” I agreed.

As I hung up the phone, I felt a sense of relief. The situation had been awkward and tense, but it seemed like things were moving in a positive direction.

Reflecting on the whole ordeal, I realized how unexpected and strange it had all been. A simple lack of food had caused so much drama, but in the end, it brought about a solution that promised to be even more fun than the original event.

How to Own Your Dream Home

For most people, their first home isn’t their dream home. It starts off nice enough. But as time goes by and your family grows, starter homes tend to get a little . . . cramped.

But don’t hate on your current home too much. Because while it gave you a safe and dry place to lay your head at night, it was also setting you up to own your dream home someday.

We’ll show you how it all works and walk you through the steps that’ll get you in your dream home—one you can actually afford!

How to Get Your Dream Home in 5 Steps

Here are the steps:

  1. Follow the Financial Basics
  2. Find Out How Much Equity You Have
  3. Set Your New Home-Buying Budget
  4. Find the Right Dream Home for You
  5. Be Picky and Patient

Now let’s cover each step in more detail.

Step 1: Follow the Financial Basics

First thing’s first—you have to get out of debt, get on a budget, and build up an emergency fund of 3–6 months of expenses. Sounds pretty basic, right? If you haven’t completed these steps, then you’re not ready to upgrade to your dream home . . . yet.

Now, when you’ve got house fever, it can be hard to focus on paying off debt or saving an emergency fund before you upgrade your home—especially when you’re feeling the pressure of rising home prices and interest rates.

But whether it’s your second or third house, you should only buy a home when you’ve covered the financial basics we mentioned above. Then you’ll be ready to start the journey toward owning your dream house.

And that journey starts with your home equity. What’s equity? Well, we’re glad you asked . . . that brings us to the next step.

Step 2: Find Out How Much Equity You Have

Home equity is a pretty simple concept: It’s your current home’s value minus whatever you still owe on your mortgage.

See, in most cases, your home’s value increases over time. Similar to other long-term investments (like retirement accounts), homes gradually increase in value. There have been periods of ups and downs in the market to be sure, but the value of real estate has consistently gone up. According to the St. Louis Federal Reserve, the average sale price of a home has increased over 2,300% from 1965 to 2023! And in the last ten years (2013 to 2023), there’s been a 68% increase.1 As your home increases in value, so does your equity. In real estate terms, this is called appreciation.

Other factors that increase your home’s equity include:

  • Added value: Home improvement projects like adding square footage, updating fixtures and appliances, or even just slapping on a new coat of paint can add value to your home.
  • Mortgage paydown: Paying down your mortgage not only gets you out of debt faster, it also builds your equity. The less you owe on your home, the more equity you have.

The amount of equity you have gives you a pretty good idea of how much money you’ll end up with after selling your house. You can use that money to make a hefty down payment and cover the other costs that come with buying a home.

Find expert agents to help you buy your home.

So, how do you determine your home’s value? Well, you can get a ballpark estimate on real estate websites like Zillow, ask a trusted real estate agent to perform a competitive market analysis (which they’ll do anyway if they’re helping you sell your house), or get a professional appraisal.

Finding out your home’s equity will involve a little math, but it’s third-grade-level stuff, so don’t sweat it.

Here’s what we mean. Let’s say your home’s current value is $355,000. When you sell that house, you’ll have to pay for between 1–3% of the sale price in closing costs, another 6% in fees for the real estate agent who helped you sell it, and whatever’s left to pay off on your mortgage.

That means you can estimate clearing over $223,000 from selling your house. That’s a killer down payment on your dream home! And if your home is paid off, that’s even more money to put down and use to pay for things like repairs and moving expenses.

Step 3: Set Your Dream Home Budget

Once you know how much you’ll clear from the sale of your home, you can start making a budget for your dream home. 

The key to owning your dream home (instead of it owning you) is to keep your mortgage payment to no more than 25% of your take-home pay on a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage, along with paying a down payment of at least 20% to avoid private mortgage insurance (PMI). Never get a 30-year mortgage even if the bank offers it (and they will). You’d pay a fortune in interest—money that should go toward building your wealth, not the bank’s.

So, let’s say your take-home pay is $4,800 a month. That means your monthly mortgage payment shouldn’t be any bigger than $1,200. By the way, that 25% figure should also include other home fees collected every month with the mortgage payment like homeowners association (HOA) fees, insurance premiums and property taxes.

Plug your numbers into our mortgage calculator to see how much house you can afford.

And don’t forget to budget for all those other costs that come with the home-buying process in addition to your closing fees—things like moving expenses and any upgrades or repairs you might need to make. You don’t want these hidden costs to catch you off guard or drain your emergency fund.

Step 4: Find the Right Dream Home for You

This is where things get real. After all your hard work building up your equity (and doing a lot of math—don’t forget that), you’re finally ready to start the house hunt. Woo-hoo!

But don’t lose focus. Stay zoned in by making a list of features that make a home fit your budget, lifestyle and dreams—and stick to it throughout your house hunt. Here are a few ideas to get you started.

  • Don’t compromise on location and layout. If you plan to be in this home for the long haul, an out-of-the-way neighborhood or a wacky floor plan is a deal breaker. Look for a community and layout that’ll suit your lifestyle now and for years to come.
  • Think about how much space your family needs. While your budget has the final say about how much home you buy, you’ll want your dream home to fit your family’s needs through different life seasons.
  • Consider the school districts. If you have or want kids, the quality of the nearby school districts is probably already on your mind. But even if you don’t have kids or you’re retired, keep in mind that having good schools nearby could increase your home’s value.
  • Look for a house that’ll grow in value. Are home values rising in the area? Is the number of businesses going up? These factors can help you figure out whether your dream home will turn into a good investment.
  • Count the costs. Want that fancy master bathroom with the multiple showerheads and the Jacuzzi tub? Be clear on what’s a must-have and what’s nice to have. And don’t forget, upgraded features like that will make your dream home more expensive.

Step 5: Be Picky and Patient

We know you’re anxious to get into those new digs, but be patient. Wait for the right house at the right time. Don’t spend your money on a less-than-ideal home just because you’re tired of looking.

The key is finding a good real estate agent who understands your budget and refuses to settle for “good enough.” They’re as committed to your dream as you are and will have your back throughout the entire process, no matter what it takes.

In addition to teaming up with a great real estate agent, you can take a couple of extra steps to make sure you’re ready to strike as soon as the right home comes up:

  • Get preapproved for a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage. Having preapproved financing is a green flag for sellers—especially in multiple offer situations. And because this puts most of your information in the lender’s system, you’ll be on the fast track to closing once your offer is accepted. 
  • Offer earnest money with your bid. Earnest money is a deposit to show you’re truly interested in a home. Usually it’s 1–2% of the home’s purchase price and it’s applied to your down payment or closing costs. Even if the deal falls through, you can almost always get most of it back.

Find a Real Estate Expert in Your Local Market

Now, you might be thinking you have some work to do before you’re ready to find your dream home. Or you may be realizing your years of hard work are about to pay off! Regardless, if you follow these steps, you’ll find the house you’ve always wanted and avoid a purchase you’ll regret.

Once you’re ready, connect with one of our RamseyTrusted real estate agents. These are high-performing agents who do business the Ramsey way and share your values so you can rest easy knowing the search for your dream home is in the right hands.

Find the only real estate agents in your area we trust, and start the hunt for your dream home!

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