Alright, everyone, assemble. Kevin Costner, the movie industry’s favorite cowboy, recently revealed some shocking news. The famous Oscar winner has formally announced his resignation from the popular series Yellowstone, in a narrative twist reminiscent of a soap opera. And oh, how delicately he dropped hints, like a bull in a china shop.
In case you missed it, Costner just posted a video on Instagram in which he said he would not be playing John Dutton again in season 5’s second half. He greeted everyone with the poise of a seasoned storyteller. After a grueling year and a half of working on Horizon and doing all the necessary tasks, I simply wanted to reach out and let you know that I know you enjoy Yellowstone, the cherished series that I adore. I’ve recently come to the realization that I won’t be able to finish Season 5b or go on.
What an unexpected twist in the story! It is simply incomprehensible, similar to choosing not to consume your dessert.
It was a very transformative experience for me. “I adored it, and I’m sure you did too,” Costner went on, touching every tender spot. “To let you know that I’m not coming back,” he said once again. Then, he gave us a classic line: “I love the relationship we’ve been able to develop. I’ll see you at the movies.” There won’t be a dry eye in the house, something tells me.
We were first introduced to John Dutton III, a character as tough as a two-dollar steak, during Costner’s tenure on the show from 2018 to 2022. He starred with a great group of actors that included Luke Grimes, Kelly Reilly, and Wes Bentley as the father of the Dutton family. Should the Yellowstone set be a rock group, Costner would undoubtedly be the front man.
The writers’ strike caused a series of production delays, but in the end, the first half of season 5 premiered from November 2022 to January 2023. A November 2023 conclusion was first promised to us, but like all good things, it was pushed back. So set a reminder for November 10, 2024, when the Dutton family will return to our screens.
“I liked the people on the show,” Costner said in an exclusive heart-to-heart interview. I found the premise appealing. That planet is my favorite. As evident by his ranking as the #1 in PEOPLE’s annual 100 Reasons to Love America issue, Kevin Costner’s love for Yellowstone is as authentic as mom’s apple pie.
“When it was first pitched to me by Taylor [Sheridan], it was one season and [like] a long movie, which [is] speaking my language,” the legend went on. however in the end, I believe the studio didn’t want that to happen.
Costner, the warrior that he is, happily
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300 worth of groceries while the employee that wants $15 an hour “monitors” and then this happened.
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300 worth of groceries while the employee that wants $15 an hour “monitors” and then this happened.
Her – why are you double bagging all of your groceries?
Me – excuse me?
Her – you are wasting our bags!
Me – if you don’t like the way I’m bagging the groceries, feel free to come on over here and bag them yourself.
Her – that’s not my job!
Me – okay, then I will bag my groceries how I please if that’s all right with you.
Her – why are you using two bags?!
Me – because the bags are weak and I don’t want the handles to break or the bottoms to rip out.
Her – well that’s because you are putting too much stuff in the bag. If you took half of that stuff out and put it in a different bag then you wouldn’t need to double bag.
*10 seconds of me just staring at her.
Me – so you want me to split these items in half and put half of them in a different bag so that I don’t have to double bag.
Her – exactly.
Me – so I would still be using two bags to hold the same number of items.
Her – no because you wouldn’t be double bagging.
*me pressing two fingers to my left eye in an attempt to make it stop twitching.
Me – okay so here I have a jug of milk and a bottle of juice double bagged. If I take the milk out and remove the double bagging and just put the milk in the single bag and the juice in that single bag I’m still using two bags for these two items.
Her- no because you are not double bagging them so it’s not the same number of bags.
*me looking around at about 10 other customers who at this point are enjoying the show.
Me- is this like that Common Core math stuff I keep hearing about?
Her- never mind you just don’t get it.
And with that, she went back to her little Podium so she could continue texting or playing games on her phone or whatever it was she was doing before she decided to come over and critique my bagging skills.
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