Reddit is the place where people share stories of their life and ask fellow redditors for advice and opinion on the decision they make.
A teenage girl recently shared that her dad and his wife-to-be excluded her from their wedding and she explained the reasons behind that heartbreaking decision.
“I (f18) was always pretty close to my dad. Closer to my mom but I often visited my dad (about 3-4 times a week). A few years ago he started dating “Anna”. Anna and I always got along when my dad proposed I was happy Anna seemed like she would be a great stepmom,” she started her post.
OP said that she was overly excited and was looking forward to the wedding. She bought a dress and shoes, but then her dad told her that he and his fiancée needed to talk to her about something important.
“Well a few weeks before the wedding after I had bought everything (dress, shoes, etc) my dad and Anna said they needed to “talk to me” Anna and my dad decided to have a child free wedding which I get especially for young kids.
“Well turns out child-free means no one under 18. On the day of the wedding, I was still going to be 17 so, therefore, I’m not allowed to be at the wedding because Anna wants to stay true to the child-free rule even for the daughter of the groom and her about-to-be stepdaughter.”
Devastated, OP told her mom what her dad and Anna said to her. The mom was as heartbroken as her daughter and decided to take her on vacation so that she cheer up. At the same time, the mom told the rest of the family what her ex-husband did to their daughter. Understandably, most of them were shocked and angry.
Later, OP posted birthday pictures on Facebook and wrote, “I’m so glad my dad and Anna didn’t allow me at their wedding since I was under 18; I feel more mature since yesterday.”
“The family was freaking out asking if that was true and bashing my dad and Anna. I later got a bunch of texts from my dad and Anna calling me immature and a selfish brat and that’s why I was too immature to be at a wedding. I was talking to some friends and they said I was kinda an AH for doing that and I should have just let it go.”
Fellow redditors shared their opinions and agreed that OP wasn’t an AH for telling the family what her dad did to her.
“NTA. What kind of man doesn’t have his own child at his wedding? Anyway, they made the choice, if they believe it was the right choice they should have no issue about it being publicly known. Plus, people might well assume you weren’t there because you disapproved of his new wife or chose a vacation instead. Ensuring people know WHY you weren’t there saves your own reputation,” one person commented.
“The no children was made for you. I’m sorry but let that sink in. She made that rule to keep you out. You now know where you stand in their marriage…you don’t. I’m so sorry. NTA. I personally think it was EPIC. Harsh but epic. They deserved more than that. I would even update it with pictures of their texts,” another added.
A third wrote, “I can’t help but wonder if she purposefully pick a date before OP birthday just so she couldn’t go. If the dad & step-mom wanted to make it child free but make sure OP was there they could have made sure the date was AFTER OP birthday but to make it just 2 days before….. nah they didn’t want her there & was just trying to use that as an excuse.”
We believe the dad was not right for excluding his own daughter from the wedding.
What are your thoughts on this?
I WANT TO DUMP MY FIANCÉ AFTER GETTING THIS ENGAGEMENT RING.
The velvet box felt heavy in my hand, the crimson lining a stark contrast to the dull silver ring nestled within. I opened it slowly, my heart pounding with anticipation. He had been so secretive, so excited, that I’d imagined a dazzling diamond, a symbol of his love and commitment.
Instead, I stared at a simple silver band, intricately engraved with Celtic knots. It was undeniably beautiful, a piece of family history, no doubt. But where was the diamond? The sparkle? The symbol of a lifetime of promises?
“It’s… it’s beautiful,” I stammered, trying to mask the disappointment in my voice.
He beamed. “I know, right? It’s my grandmother’s ring. It has so much significance.”
He launched into a heartfelt speech about his grandmother, a woman I had never met, and the enduring legacy of this ring. He spoke of family history, of love passed down through generations. But all I could think about was the glaring absence of a diamond.
Had he even looked at it? Did he not see the way my eyes glazed over, the way my smile felt forced? Did he truly believe this heirloom, this symbol of his family’s past, could compensate for the lack of a present, tangible symbol of his love for me?
Later that evening, as I lay awake, the ring, cold and lifeless on my finger, felt like a heavy weight. I pictured the other women I knew, their hands adorned with sparkling diamonds, their faces radiant with joy. I imagined the envious glances, the whispered questions. “Where’s the diamond?” they would ask.
And then, the thought hit me: I deserved better. I deserved to feel cherished, to feel special. I deserved a ring that reflected the love he professed to have for me, a ring that made me feel like the most precious woman in the world.
A week. That’s all I would give him. One week to rectify this situation, to show me that he understood, that he valued my feelings. If he failed to do so, if he continued to dismiss my concerns, then this relationship was over.
The next morning, I woke up with a renewed sense of determination. I would not settle for less than I deserved. I would not allow him to diminish my worth.
The week that followed was a whirlwind of emotions. I tried to be understanding, to approach the subject with tact and diplomacy. I brought up the topic of engagement rings casually, mentioning articles I had read about modern trends, about the significance of diamonds in contemporary society.
He seemed oblivious. He talked about his grandmother, about family traditions, about the “sentimental value” of the ring. He even tried to convince me that diamonds were overrated, that true love was about more than material possessions.
But his words fell on deaf ears. My resolve hardened with each passing day. I knew what I wanted, and I wasn’t going to compromise.
Finally, on the seventh day, I sat him down for a serious conversation. “Look,” I said, my voice firm but gentle, “I appreciate the sentimental value of the ring, truly. But I also want to feel cherished, to feel like I’m truly valued. And honestly, I don’t feel that way.”
He looked at me, his face a mixture of surprise and hurt. “I don’t understand,” he said, his voice slightly defensive. “I gave you my grandmother’s ring. What more could you want?”
“I want to feel special,” I repeated, my voice unwavering. “I want to feel like you put as much thought into choosing my ring as you did into choosing me.”
He stared at me for a long moment, then looked down at his hands. “I… I don’t know what to say,” he finally admitted, his voice subdued.
“Then let me tell you,” I said, my voice steady. “I deserve a ring that reflects the depth of your love for me. A ring that makes me feel like the most beautiful, cherished woman in the world. If you can’t give me that, then maybe we’re not meant to be.”
The silence that followed was deafening. He looked at me, his eyes filled with a mixture of hurt and confusion. Finally, he nodded slowly. “I understand.”
And with that, the engagement was over. It wasn’t the ending I had envisioned, but it was the ending I deserved. I walked away, my head held high, knowing that I had made the right decision. I deserved to be loved, truly loved, for who I was. And I deserved a ring that reflected that love, a ring that sparkled as brightly as the future I envisioned for myself.
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