Just as my wife’s water broke, I got a call from my mother’s nurse, and she told me my mom was dying. I was torn and forced to make a difficult decision.
The day Debra found out she was pregnant was one of those days that I will cherish for the rest of my life. We had cried together, unable to believe that we were going to have a baby home soon, and I promised Debra I’d be an amazing dad.
Debra and I had waited to become parents for a long time. We were one of those miracle couples who conceived after going through tons of failed fertility treatments and doctors telling us there was no chance.
“We’ll be the best parents to him, darling,” I told Debra one night. “I can’t wait to hold our baby in my arms.”
“I know, honey,” she’d said, smiling. I gently kissed her baby bump and promised Debra I’d always be by her side.
Debra had always been very anxious about the pregnancy due to the complications, and I had told her I would be there for her, so there was no need to worry.
Little did I know fate would plunge me into a situation where I’d have to choose between her and my mom while was in labor…
I still get chills when I recall that day. It started as a beautiful day. The sun was shining brightly, and nothing seemed wrong with the outside world. I was preparing breakfast in the kitchen because Debra wasn’t feeling well that morning.
I quickly assembled a breakfast plate for her, and I went to call her for breakfast. As I entered our bedroom, I saw she was leaning against the wall with one hand, clutching her baby bump and breathing heavily.
“Honey, are you okay?” I dashed to her, worried. “Should I call the doctor?”
“Gordon…my water…it…it broke,” she whispered heavily, and that’s when I noticed the floor beneath her. It was wet. “Take me to the hospital, Gordon…Please!” she cried.
“Jesus!” I panicked. “I’ll get the car started. Just hang on a sec, honey.”
I ran to our car, grabbing the keys from the bowl on the living room shelf. I opened the car door, then rushed back inside to help Debra.
“Don’t worry, honey. We’ll reach the hospital in no time. Okay, we’ve got this.” I was comforting her as her labor pains began. I was terrified and nervous. I was praying everything would be fine.
After we made it to the car and Debra got inside, I locked her door and rushed to take my seat. Then my phone rang. It was my mom’s nurse, Marla, calling me. My mother had been diagnosed with a progressive cardiac condition, and due to her illness, she was confined to bed rest.
Worried, I answered the phone, and Marla’s voice on the other end of the line broke me from inside.
“Gordon,” she said in a weak voice. “Your mom… She had a heart attack, so I took her to the hospital. The doctors say there is little hope she’ll make it… Your mother is dying. I think you should be here as soon as you can.”
“Jesus, Jesus!” I exhaled a sigh. Why was everything happening at the same time? I was ripped to shreds and didn’t know what to do. On the one hand, there was Debra, who was in labor, and on the other, there was my mother.
I went inside the car, tears in my eyes, and told Debra everything. I couldn’t hide it from her, anyway. She saw my face and asked me what was wrong. And I blurted everything out.
“Mom is dying, honey. She had a heart attack, and Marla’s asking me to be there as soon as possible. I am so nervous. I – I don’t know what to do….”
“Honey,” Debra said. “Call a taxi. I’ll go by myself…”
“What?” I was taken aback. “No, we can’t do that!”. She was drenched in sweat and moaning in pain. “Look at you. It’s just not….”
“We don’t have time, honey…Ahh…call the taxi now, Gordon. Your mom needs you. You are a son first, then a husband. I will manage. Your mom…she…” Her pain was becoming worse.
“I’m calling the taxi. Oh, God!”
Thankfully, I got a taxi soon, and I instructed the driver to take Debra to the hospital safely. My hands shook as I drove to my mother’s hospital, and my tears wouldn’t stop. My heart was racing, wondering about Debra’s condition and if our baby would be alright.
MY MIL DRESSED AS A WITCH FOR HALLOWEEN — AND NOW MY KID IS TR.AUMATlZE.D!
It sounds like such a tough situation! Halloween is supposed to be fun, but I can completely see how this went too far, especially for a young child. Here’s a possible approach that might help calm her fears and explain the situation:
First, try gently talking to your daughter and validating her feelings. Tell her it’s okay to feel scared and that even grown-ups can be spooked sometimes. Then, explain that Halloween is a time when people dress up to look silly or different from how they usually do – even adults! You could say, “Grandma was just pretending to be a witch, like when you dress up as a princess or a superhero.”
If she’s still worried, maybe go through some pictures together, like showing her photos of grandma without the costume. You could even do a fun little makeup session at home where you both take turns “transforming” each other, so she can see that makeup and costumes are just ways to play pretend.
Later, maybe you and your mother-in-law can arrange a calm, positive visit where she can be herself, maybe even in “happy” colors instead of the dark ones that might remind your daughter of the witch costume. Hopefully, it will help replace those scary memories with warmer ones, and grandma can be back in her good books soon!
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